Visiting that place called The USA

I'm sitting on a bus. Still. I left Chico around 11am yesterday and it looks like I will arrive at about 11pm in David which is where I will spend the night before continuing on to my community tomorrow. This might be one of the longest trips I've ever had to take and it has been pretty taxing on me. The last week has been a whirlwind as well. I visited home after being gone for a year and it was more than strange. Panama and California could not be further apart. Well, I was able to order some food in Spanish but that was about it. Its just a different world though and thinking people would understand that would be dumb of me. Most were polite and asked simple questions about the differences. I got a couple crazy questions like if I had a translator when I talked.

I think the biggest difference between the two places is mostly physical. We have such nice roads and infrastructure back home with tree lined freshly paved roads and kept parks. I think we really take these things for granted. Of course our tax money actually makes it into government which provides these services which can be a problem here, but I remember arriving into Marysville and thinking that it looked really nice. I thought maybe they had done a makeover or something but it was just that I had been living in a place where building crumble just years after being built and trash replaces sidewalks.

It was nice being back home and Kevin's wedding was great too. I have to admit that I was a little nervous doing the best man speech but was glad I practiced and revised it because I had about 15 people tell me it was probably the best they had ever heard. The bride's mom included. I guess I've gotten better at speaking from the heart which is one thing that comes with age. Speaking of age, I'm now 32. Yep, it happened. I got older. There was really nothing I could do about it. I would say that it is scary being this old but its not really. The fact is that if I turn my hat sideways and grow my hair out a little bit I still look 26......which is probably why I know have long hair and bought a baseball cap to wear. When it is all said and done here in Panama I will be 33 and will have had 3 birthdays during my service. I guess some would be scared by now. When you start racking up numbers like these you can't help but wonder if there will come a point where I need to settle down and start a family. I'm not going to lie, I think about it often, but I think I've come to the conclusion to give myself a couple more years of jungle/saving the world life before I start getting too serious about that. I should look like I'm about 29 by then and at least act like I'm 25.

Seeing my parents and brothers were amazing and seeing everyone at the wedding was great too. It was almost overwhelming to see so many people that I haven't seen for so long all at once. I did have one disappointment and that was getting friends together the last night Matt and I spent in town. A lot of people had said they were going to make it and very little showed up. I do have to give it to Ari, Jenna, and Lincoln among others that did come out, but people that really wanted to see again and won't be able to for at least another year just didn't show up when they said they would. I could probably just list their names right here because I'm sure these same friends don't read my blog. I don't know if they thought they would see me again soon somehow or if they just stopped being my friends because it's been so long but I had spent months in anticipation for the night we could all hang out. In a way I was a little hurt and saddened. Mostly because there is a good chance I will not be coming home for long time and these particular people are not very good at keeping in touch. Que sera

So another year. That is about what I have left. Actually a little bit more but lets just call it a year. I should be arriving back into my community tomorrow with a whole new excitement and enthusiasm. That is until I get sick again and get kicked out of my community. I'm really scared of this happening because the next step will be me living in the hellish gringo land that is Bocas Island. As with all things I can adapt and if I were to live in a non gringo neighborhood, I'm sure it would make it better. I just don't want to live in a place where the faces change every day and drinking and surfing are the two main pass times. I know that doesn't seem too bad but I didn't join the Peace Corps to have a good time. I actually like being in the indigenous village and doing real development work. I like being woken up at 6am to go machete some grass with my neighbor. I like being in the jungle, and having to deal with the mosquitoes, noise, sickness, animals, and constant kids running around is all part of that. It is something I will only have once in my life in this way and I want the full thing. Not some half assed service where I go into my community twice a week. I might as well be on vacation if that is going to happen. I have considered that there are some organizations on the island such the Smithsonian that could use help but again its not like living in an indigenous village. We will see how it pans out.

This month should be a big month for us in the community as we are going to be part of a fair where we can sell our chocolate and also we should start having our tour available online to buy through a new travel agency. More updates soon about those things. Until then, thanks for reading. It's been a wild ride so far...